.Sunday, July 23, 2006 ' 8:44:00 PM Y
XOXO, there's only me.
Let it go
You cant hold on when you're stretched so thin
You're just too weak
Cos you know it hurts to hold on but even more so if you let go
It's gone, no use clinging on to your misery
Slap on your face, wake up from it
Time and again, words exchanged but the wound aint getting better
Anxious to part but pleading for it not to arrive
The painful silence, the dryness of your throat
Wishing things wouldnt be like this
Nevertheless it never changes
You're just too fucking useless
Picking up a book and staring at it each time she walks pass
Whatcha tryin to prove?
You're kidding no one but yourself
Time is running out
Results in hand and you're punched back into reality
Blame yourself for being so fucking pathetic
Your very existence brings misery to others
Nothing but a fucking piece of useless shit
Always losing yourself in tears
That further shows how pathetic you are
You cant do anything right
Everything is ultimately
your fault
Without you, your parents will have less to worry about
Less to waste their money on
They won't 'have to be sorry to have a daughter like you'
You're just gonna let them down in the end
Your teachers will have less a headache, a bitch less to deal with
Less a failure to pull down their quota
He wouldn't hafta put up with you
Fully concentrate on what he suppose to
Probably find someone else much better too
You arent a really great friend either
Your absence wun prove to be much or best say,
any loss to your friends at all
Can't you see? You're
nothingStop wishin for things to be better
To be seen differently, not to be lied to
Or for the feeling of being wanted or loved
Simply because you're not worth it
Jamie, why don't you just die?
.Sunday, July 16, 2006 ' 12:31:00 PM Y
XOXO, there's only me.
Yesterday was Odac's 20th handover ceremony
Wow Jue Chen actions reminds me of me la
Dunno if that's good or bad
Haha cant wait for ah pui to flirt with the next chief only to realise he's male
Counting down till farewell night
Better give me something nice! =)
Must study study study!! 8 weeks till prelims, 13 weeks till 'A'...
That's the time I have left to change my failing grades to As
C'mon man...Mr. sponsored-holiday-trip, pls be my motivation
Congrats to AZN for the inter-fac badminton and good luck for your bball ^______^
Jia you in fetching water, your team is sugoi! Oops~
Haha no la, you're li hai also la!
I hope things stay this way too =)
.Friday, July 07, 2006 ' 11:37:00 PM Y
XOXO, there's only me.
Keeping my mind focus for the next 4 mths
Heck everything else
Easier said than done
To skip a rather important event?
Why do I even bother about it
To once again contribute so much at my expense
Only to sit back and watch as I get nothing in return?
So fucking tired of the repeating scenario
Facing the often rejection
Every little undesirable action sparks instaneous flashbacks
Of every upsetting moment
The difficulty in lifting a finger for that reply
More emotionally exhausting it is for me
To constantly keep my hopes up
Surprise me, wont you?
All I wish for is for you to play your part
Or maybe that's too much to ask for
Perhaps I ain't good enough
Lack the brains, qualities, niches, looks
4 months till I finally do something about it
I'll definitely like to stop wasting my time
But that'll probably further deter me from my path
Would you even care if I do so?
Living in a hellmouth
Reflecting on my screwed up pathetic life
For tears to put me to sleep almost every other night
So to keep my mind focus for the next 4 mths
Heck everything else
Is that even possible?
